Codyisms: Thick Skull

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Good Gods this kid has a THICK SKULL.
Kid: (random obnoxious crap)
Me: Please stop doing doing that.
Kid: (random obnoxious crap)
Me: Did you hear me? I asked you to stop doing that.
Kid: (random obnoxious crap)
Me: LAST CHANCE.. If you don’t stop doing that you need to go to your room.
Kid: (random obnoxious crap)
Me: Okay. Go to your room then.
Kid: I DON’T WANT TO GO TO MY ROOM!!!! I HATE MY ROOM!
Me: Did I ask you to stop doing that?
Kid: Yes.
Me: Did you stop doing that?
Kid: No.
Me: Go to your room then.
Kid: (Stomps off to room)
Me: You better not slam that door.
Kid: Fine. (doesn’t)
(momentary silence)
Kid: (sticking face at bottom of door) bllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhggggg
(momentary silence)
Kid: (sticking face at bottom of door) bllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhggggg
(momentary silence)
Me: (sigh)
Kid: (sticking face at bottom of door) bllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhggggg
Me: THAT IS ENOUGH. Quit the noise and behave yourself or you’ll be in there until lunch.
Kid: (sticking face at bottom of door) bllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhggggg
Me: Okay, I’ll call you when it’s lunchtime then. See you later!
Kid: NOOOOOOOOO I DON’T WANT TO BE IN MY ROOM!! I HATE MY ROOM!!!
Me: Did I ask you to stop?
Kid: Yes.
Me: Did you stop?
Kid: No.
Me: Well, like I said, if you don’t stop you’re staying there until lunchtime.
Kid: NOOOOOOOOO I DON’T WANT TO BE IN MY ROOM!! I HATE MY ROOM!!!
Me: Do you need a spanking too?
Kid: No.
Me: Are you sure?
Kid: I don’t need a spanking.
Me: Okay, well behave yourself, play in here nicely and I’ll see you in a little while for lunch.
Kid: (glaring but silent)
(MAYBE three minutes pass)
Kid: (sticking face at bottom of door) bllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhggggg
Me: (bangs head on wall)

Anyone want a 5 year old? I’ll give you free shipping…

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